Janet Fisher, janetfi@hotmail.com

The Catwoman of Toulouse

 

The cops got a call which they thought was a ruse[1]

They broke in an old lady's house in Toulouse [2]

They found she was living with 1000 rats

Who amused[3] themselves by harassing[4] her cats.

 

Her favorite, a tabby, went missing that morn

While calling its name, she was treated with scorn[5]

From spiritless, beady, rat eyes, she could swear

Came distinctly[6] the odd little smirk not to bear.

 

She dialed the number she thought would bring aid

But the little Gens-D'Arms[7] all shrank back from the raid.

Dip a toe in her house, they would not! said the group

Cause their shiny black boots might be soiled[8] by the poop.

[1] Ruse :  A trick you play on someone.  In this case, a crank call, which is a naughty thing that you should not know about.  Do you?  No, you do not, because you are a good kid.

[2] Toulouse :  A pretty city in France with lots of old ladies and lots of cats.

[3] Amused:  To have a good time.  The next time someone plays a ruse on you, stand tall like a king or queen and say, “We are not amused.”

[4] Harassing:  Bugging someone.  Next time someone bugs you, freak them out by saying, “Stop harassing me, or I will call my lawyer!”

[5] Scorn: To treat badly.  These rats have no respect for anyone and must be stopped!

[6] Distinctly: Clearly.  The next time someone says to you, “Do I make myself clear?” freak them out by saying, “Distinctly… crystal… clear.”

[7] Gens D’arms: This is French for fancy French police.  You say it like this, “jon darms”.

[8] Soiled:  Made dirty.  The next time you hear someone say a naughty word, say to them, “You’ve soiled your mouth!”